Hi, this is Dean Cortez, creator of the Mack Tactics dating system for men.
I want to share with you some tips on how to flirt with women that have worked really well for me.
In my book Mack Tactics I explain how human nature is the deciding factor in the way men and women relate to each other. Every time we converse with a girl, there is so much going on beneath the surface... signals and messages flying back and forth that we aren't consciously aware of.
Send the WRONG signals, and women are going to be instinctively turned off ... no matter how sharp you look, or how clever you are with conversation.
Send the RIGHT signals, and the women are going to feel an undeniable ATTRACTION towards you.
Here are some quick tips on how to flirt with a girl, that are based on human nature:
* When you engage a woman in conversation, be aware of how you angle your body. Men tend to talk to each other at angles to avoid confrontation. Women face each other head-on and maintain eye contact. You should engage them the same way.
* Handshakes are very important. Usually, this is your first opportunity at "keno" (establishing physical contact.) Our hands are filled with tactile nerves. If your handshake is loose and feels clammy, you're signaling that you are anxious, and this will naturally elevate HER stress levels.
Give her hand a firm, but not bone-crushing, grasp. Pay attention to her grip also.
I've found that women who give firmer handshakes tend to be more adventurous. This must come from the fact that they're more comfortable socially, and confident in themselves.
* As the conversation develops, use body contact to build the sense of connection and generate sparks. Subtly touch her knee as you tell a story. Put your hand on hers for a brief moment, as you both laugh at a joke.
(Her inner forearm is a GREAT spot to use a flirting touch, since this zone of her body is rich with nerves.) But don't look at your hand as you touch her. Just do it, as if it's a completely natural gesture.
* Women are attracted to deeper-voiced men. This suggests high testosterone levels, which is a sign of strength and reproductive ability. If you don't have a naturally deep voice, lower your tone slightly when you engage her in conversation.
Speaking slower also helps when you are flirting with a girl. A deep voice, combined with eye contact, can have a hypnotic (and deeply attractive) effect.
Also, talk at the same pace she does. This enhances the sense that the two of your are connecting and bonding.
Watch an insecure guy flirt with girls, and he'll almost always speak at a faster clip than she does. (This is very true with "funny guys," who try to use constant jokes as substitute for real conversation.)
* Mirror her body language. Couples who are attracted to each other tend to subconsciously "mirror" each other. By mirroring her, you are again building the sense that you are connecting on a deeper level.
* DON'T fidget. This sends the message that you are nervous, and will trigger the release of stress chemicals in her brain. When you are calm and relaxed, you encourage her to go with your flow. You don't need to use a lot of flirting body language. Just be relaxed and comfortable, and smile and maintain eye contact.
* When women sense that a bond is developing, her brain will release dopamine, a mood booster. Create this bond by getting her to talk about herself and her interests and passions, and indicate your interest with nods and short phrases
("Oh my God, that's so true." "Hmm, that's really interesting." "Go on, tell me more." "I completely agree." "I feel the same way").
(There are going to be times when you'll want to tease her or "neg" her, to build sexual tension, and I explain how to do this CORRECTLY in the Mack Tactics program...but when she's talking about things that matter to her, you always want to agree to demonstrate compatibility.)
* Next tip when you are flirting with girls: know that women are instinctively listening for signs of your social status and/or wealth.
Women are wired to go after men who can protect them and provide for a family. So while it's important to demonstrate these capabilities, you should keep any references to your financial or personal success vague.
When you flirt with women it's better to make her curious, and cultivate a sense of mystery around yourself. Instead of answering her directly when she asks what you do for a living, be vague. ("Let's just say I'm very good at what I do, and to me it's a passion, not a job.")
With your social status, it's also better to slip in vague references. (We all hate "name droppers.") Send the message that you're a popular, desirable person, but don't be obvious about it.
When you flirt with girls, talking about your male buddies isn't attractive or interesting. Instead, mention your FEMALE FRIENDS to demonstrate that you have a strong social network. (Every guy has male friends. Macks also have a network of cool, fun female friends.)
You can create quick stories when you flirt with women that are loaded with signs of social status, without ever sounding OBVIOUS, or like you're "trying too hard."
For example, tell her: "This morning was crazy. My friend Lisa was out of town on a modeling shoot and I was supposed to pick her up at the airport, but there was an accident on the freeway and the traffic was backed up for miles. Fortunately her plane got delayed so I got there on time."
(The message: you've got a friend who is a female model.,
"Oh, so you like Indian food? I found the best Indian restaurant, I took my friend Jennifer there a few nights ago to celebrate her job promotion."
(You've got a female friend who is ambitious and successful, and you generously took her to dinner.)
You get the idea. A quick "mention" of your female friends when you flirt with girls sends a powerful message to the woman you're talking to: you're popular among other females, which means you must have VALUE. If the girl you're talking to is digging you, this is also going to stir up an instinctual feeling of jealousy... and a desire to WIN you away from the competition.
Remember, YOU are the prize. Now go out there and start acting like it!
Your Wingman,
Dean Cortez
Video Source: Youtube